For parents of a child who have decided to perform the sacrament of baptism for their child, perhaps the main task is to choose an attorney for mom and dad. Until the very day of the ceremony, the question often arises for a girl whether she should be a married woman or not.

Traditionally, it is believed that the godmother should be chosen from singles. There is a belief: if the godmother is not married, then after the ceremony she will meet her long-awaited love. But if a girl, unfortunately, cannot get pregnant for a long time and suddenly acquires the status of a godmother, then soon she herself will definitely be able to enjoy motherhood.

If Godfather guides the worldly life of the child, then godmother called to guide him on his spiritual path: it was she who brought the baby into the temple, and she also raises him in faith and purity.

Difficult choice

To choose a girl for the role of godmother, you can contact an ordained or simply experienced priest. Most often, a week before the priest, they talk about the sacrament itself, what things need to be purchased, and about the important role and mission that the chosen new parents have. In the end, the most important thing when choosing a godmother is not the question of her status in society, but the topic of religion. It is important that the godmother is a believer and baptized.

The godmother is obliged to buy an icon of the saint with the girl’s name and a special cloth, which is covered with kryzhma. The best kryzhma would be a completely new fabric, symbolizing the purity of a little girl. It is believed that in the future the baby’s mother will carefully store this fabric and not show it to anyone.

A child can be baptized after 8 days from birth, but it is important to consider that a woman who has given birth cannot enter the temple for 40 days from birth.

Beliefs

But still, there are many terrible legends among the people that if the godmother did not have time to get married before the ceremony, she will give her family happiness, but she herself will never become a happy wife. Allegedly this is why it is necessary to invite married woman, who already has a wonderful destiny and has her own family. One way or another, all these are just superstitions, and it’s up to the parents to choose who will be the godmother; the main thing is to approach the issue seriously. It is important that the person intended for the role is kind, believes in the Lord, and treats the new role with all the responsibility entrusted to him. The godmother is the second mother of the child, who throughout his future life will help and support him in all matters and endeavors.

Is it possible for unmarried girls to have girls baptized? Yes. To become a godmother, you need to have a firm faith in God, profess Orthodoxy, love your future goddaughter as your daughter, and trust her parents as you trust yourself. The age and marital status of the future godmother do not matter. There can be only one restriction for a believing girl: you cannot baptize a child together with your future husband. That is, a couple who is dating and planning to start a family cannot become godparents for the same child.

Superstitions

Often, when choosing future godparents, mom and dad ask themselves the question: is it possible for an unmarried girl to baptize her first girl? This is due to folk signs and superstitions, nothing to do with Orthodox teaching not having. For some reason, it is generally accepted that an unmarried godmother gives her happiness to her goddaughter. These are, in Russian, "old wives' tales." “According to your faith, be it done to you,” is the correct attitude towards all signs and superstitions. “Don’t believe it and it won’t come true,” said the saint Venerable Seraphim Sarovsky about bad omens. If a girl believes with all her soul that she and her goddaughter find common happiness during the Sacrament, then that’s exactly what will happen. You can say to yourself out of spite: “In this way I call on God’s blessing for my own happy marriage and motherhood.” And, believe me, this is exactly what will come true if you truly believe. So, is it possible for unmarried girls to baptize girls? It is possible and necessary if you approach your future title responsibly.

If you baptized a child together, you cannot marry

An unmarried girl? The girl is baptized by the godmother, the boy by the godfather. But at the same time, for a girl, both the father and the mother are often invited. Here an important condition arises, which can become an obstacle to the choice of a particular person for the role of godmother or godfather. It seems very sweet when a future couple seals their feelings by baptizing their baby together. This is what people who are ignorant of church canons often do. The fact is that the recipients, when performing the Sacrament, enter into a spiritual relationship. This is the obstacle. If the couple subsequently wishes to get married, they will be refused. It is forbidden to perform the Sacrament of Wedding on people who are in such a relationship, that is, who are the spiritual parents of the same baby.

Nowadays, such stories also happen: mom and dad get divorced, then dad wants to marry his godfather. Such marriages are also not blessed. Answer to the question: “Can unmarried girls have girls baptized?” next: it is possible if the girl is going to become a nun, has simply taken a vow of celibacy, and also if the godfather does not take part in the baptism or is not her likely groom.

What does it mean to be a godmother?

“You can’t baptize the first girl for an unmarried girl!” - states categorically folk sign. Answer: it doesn’t matter what gender the child is, whether he is the first or the tenth. It is important to take the upcoming Sacrament responsibly. The baby does not yet and cannot have his own faith; the baby is baptized according to the faith of his or her successor. The girl gives God her word that she will bring this baby to Him. The spiritual mother becomes the guardian of faith and piety for the goddaughter. On Last Judgment godparents will answer for the sins of their godchildren, for the fact that they spent their lives outside the Church, outside the faith of Christ. That is, if the girl herself does not really believe or knows that the parents of the future goddaughter will not raise her in Orthodox faith, it is better to refuse the offered role. You can baptize the daughter of unbelieving parents, provided that the godmother has the opportunity to take an active part in her upbringing, for example, a governess or a very close relative. A clear example: a believing girl baptizes a baby from the orphanage where she works, firmly knowing that raising her goddaughter will fall on her shoulders at least for the next few years. But in no case should children be baptized by people who are atheists, people of other faiths (Muslims, Buddhists, etc.) or unchurched (those who do not attend church services more often than once every few months and do not receive communion at least once a year ).

How to prepare

About how to properly prepare for a future godmother, it is best to ask the priest who will perform this Sacrament. In most churches, special conversations are held on how to prepare yourself and prepare a child for parents and future adoptees. If there is no such opportunity in the church where the Baptism will take place, and the priest for some reason could not devote time to the future godparents, then you can purchase the appropriate literature. In any case, it is advisable for the godmother to receive communion on the day of the Sacrament or the day before, having made the necessary preparations beforehand. It’s good if you manage to find time to read the Gospel during the week before baptism. Be sure to throughout the week before and during the Sacrament itself, you must pray with all your heart to God and the Mother of God for blessings for yourself and your goddaughter, and ask for help in fulfilling your obligations. Is it possible for unmarried girls to have girls baptized? Any girl or woman who seriously, responsibly, and with reverence approaches her role in the Sacrament and the entire future life of the child can baptize a girl.

The baptism of a child is an event that happens to every religious family. However, few people know that such an Orthodox ritual can affect the future fate of both parents and their child. To understand how to avoid negative consequences and not to invite trouble, it is necessary to turn to folk wisdom.

Baptizing the first daughter of an unmarried girl means failure in personal life

In the superstitions that have come down to us, there are instructions on how to properly prepare and conduct baptism. For example, signs are relevant that explain whether an unmarried or separated girl can be baptized.

Reasons why an unmarried girl should not be baptized

According to signs, the baptism of a girl by an unmarried woman is a bad sign; it indicates negative events in the near future.

• Baptizing your first daughter to an unmarried girl means failure in your personal life. The child will not be able to have a relationship with a member of the opposite sex. Young people will have no interest in the girl, which is why she will be disappointed in her appearance. This will entail low self-esteem and a desire to radically change the data. Attempts to make the body ideal will stop only after the appearance of a young man in life.
• The baptism of a second child is a harbinger of an unexpected change in behavior. The child will stop listening to his parents and will envy his peers and older brother or sister. This will result in a long-term confrontation between children, which will end only in adulthood.
• If a child who was baptized by an unmarried girl was born 3rd or 4th in a family, then you should expect disappointment in close friends. The girl will have to repeatedly convince herself that her friends will not always respond to requests and help in difficult situations.
• For an unmarried girl to baptize the only child in the family is a bad omen. Parents will regularly quarrel among themselves. Showdowns and ongoing conflicts will lead to a breakup.

Why can't a woman who is divorced have a girl baptized?

Also, signs have reached us that explain why the first or only girl of a woman who has divorced her husband cannot be baptized. This can affect the child's relationship with his parents.

1. According to superstitions, if a woman divorces a man in the first 3 years after the wedding, then her goddaughter will experience communication with peers, which will negatively affect her behavior. Soon there will be quarrels with parents and distance from them, while the role of friends in life will increase. The girl will maintain a disdainful attitude towards elders into adulthood, which will cause career failures.
2. Baptism of a girl by a single woman who separated from her husband after 4 or more years life together, is a harbinger of melancholy in a child. A sad mood and reluctance to start any tasks will lead to a lag compared to peers. In the future, this will also affect professional self-determination and choice of life path.
3. A girl whose godmother divorced and remarried is expected minor troubles every christening. She will have to deal with rude attitudes, unpleasant gifts and quarrels with friends on this day. A series of minor misfortunes will regularly spoil the holiday, which will cause a negative attitude towards the date of baptism.
4. If the reason for the divorce was infidelity, then a woman should under no circumstances become the girl’s godmother. This can lead to long-term misunderstandings between the child and the young people around him. At a more conscious age, the goddaughter will try to find her happiness with one of the men she knows, but this will only lead to a broken heart and lowered self-esteem. In the future, the girl will also not be able to build family relationships with representatives of the opposite sex.

Baptizing a boy on Monday means that soon one of the parents will have the opportunity to move up the career ladder

The opinion of the Orthodox Church on the baptism of children by unmarried girls

There are several opinions about whether an unmarried woman can baptize a child. According to representatives Orthodox Church, it is necessary to answer this question based on the daughter’s age. Depending on how old the girl is, it becomes clear whether she can be baptized by an unmarried woman.

• Up to 1 year of age, a child at this time can still be baptized by an unmarried woman. The event will not affect the future life of either the girl or her godmother.
• From 2 to 3 years is the period when such an event can affect the health of relatives. They will often get sick until minor ailments develop into serious ailments. You will have to spend a lot of effort and money to get rid of the disease.
• From 4 to 7 years old, it is no longer possible for an unmarried girl to baptize a child. This can affect the girl's hobbies. She will be interested in the unimportant or meaningless, which is why she will not have time for more significant things. This will negatively affect her horizons.
• From 8 to 10 years old - it is also not recommended to choose a godmother among unmarried people. The girl will soon realize that she does not share the opinions of others, including her parents. In the future, this will lead to distance from friends and family.
• From 11 to 15 – an unmarried girl cannot be baptized. The position of a lonely and self-sufficient person can scare away a teenager, which is why she will try to quickly enter into a relationship.
• Over 16 – you can already choose an unmarried lady as your godparent. The girl’s personality has already been formed, so such an event will not affect her life.

Is it possible for an unmarried girl to baptize a boy?

An unmarried girl can baptize a boy.

This will be a good sign of fate, which will indicate further positive events. Based on what day the Orthodox ritual was performed, you can look into the future.

1. Baptizing a boy on Monday means that one of the parents will soon have the opportunity to move up the career ladder. The promotion will be the result of the boss's unexpected generosity and will lead to a deterioration in relations between colleagues. Despite the decrease in the number of friends, the overall standard of living will improve.
2. The boy's baptism by an unmarried woman, which took place on Tuesday, indicates an emerging interest in studies. The child will come under the influence of an adult who will attract him to a more detailed study of one of the sciences. This will affect further professional self-determination and choice of your business.
3. If a boy was baptized by an unmarried woman on Wednesday, then he should expect to meet a good man. One of the new friends will be interesting conversationalist, and then will become a true friend.
4. Baptism on Thursday means quick deliverance from enemies. The boy will understand what needs to be done so as not to attract the attention of ill-wishers. This will have a positive impact on his academic performance, self-esteem and mood.
5. An unmarried godmother in a Friday Orthodox ceremony is a harbinger of changes in relationships with representatives of the opposite sex. The boy will become more interested in one of his friends, which will lead to the beginning of a romantic relationship.
6. An Orthodox ritual performed on Saturday will improve relations with parents. The boy will understand that conversations with mom and dad help him understand life's problems, thanks to which he will be able to trust adults more.
7. If a boy was baptized by an unmarried woman on Sunday, then he will have a conversation with one of his friends. After the conversation, comrades will understand each other better. Thanks to this, their friendship will become a source of support, it will last for many years of life.

The baptism of a daughter by an unmarried woman is an act that you can only dare to do after becoming familiar with the signs and superstitions. Only by comparing all the information can you make correct solution, which will not affect the future life of the child and parents.

Any church sacraments in the popular consciousness are associated with far-fetched and empty ancient thoughts, superstitions and prejudices that have no connection. The word “superstition” is formed in two parts: “ sue» - « in vain" And " faith", which means " vain belief», « vain faith", i.e. empty. It is extremely unwise to live by superstitions alone and give them important, especially when performing church sacraments. One of them is baptism - the beginning of the path of the immortal soul to eternal life, to God.

Why can't the first girl be baptized?

Various superstitions have come down to us regarding the choice of a godmother. For example, it is believed that pregnant women cannot baptize a child, otherwise their child may die without being born or will not live long after birth.

Many have heard such a superstition that unmarried girls and women were not called godparents for girls. unmarried? People have several answers to this question:

1. Unmarried women can “give” their happiness to their goddaughter.
2. To prevent the “crown of celibacy” from going to the goddaughter, only married people were chosen as godparents.

In addition, due to the fact that the goddaughter “takes over” the fate of her godmother, only women who were happily married and satisfied with their fate were taken as successors.

Church opinion

Civilized people, and especially religious people, should not believe in superstitions. For a child, it does not matter what social position his godmother occupies. It is important that the recipient lives according to God’s laws and passes on her spiritual knowledge.

English superstition

Such superstitions regarding baptism exist not only in our country. The British living in the north and west of the country try not to baptize a girl before a boy. Why can't the first girl be baptized? in England?

According to medieval belief, witches flying around a girl can take hair off a boy’s face: a man’s lack of facial hair – a mustache and beard – is a satanic sign, and the man himself is Satan’s henchman.

Baptism ceremony

The ritual of baptism existed long before the advent of Christianity, which borrowed it from ancient pagan beliefs. In ancient times, baptism “introduced” a newborn into the community, which protected its new member from enemies, evil forces and evil spirits. Basically, baptism took place immediately after birth: the midwife “sold” the child to the future godparents, who carried him to church to “create a man.” According to scientists, the rite of baptism in paganism has ritual significance. According to him, the midwife represents the pagan principle, nature, which “sculpts” the body, creates the form, and the godparents represent the Christian, they give the name to the newborn and introduce him to the spiritual sphere. Through the joint efforts of godparents and midwives new person through the rite of baptism he enters the community, society.

That is why baptism is considered the main rite of the beginning of life, as a result of which the child receives one more, spiritual, parents (adoptives) - godmother and godfather (for biological ones - godfather), who are responsible for the spiritual education and piety of the godson before God. In addition, in Everyday life godparents act as protectors and wise advisers.

The meaning of the sacrament

As a result of baptism, the child's original sin, and he appears clean before God. In addition, baptism allows a person in the future to become the recipient of another child, to get married, to take part in other church sacraments, and for others to pray for him.

Kumovya

We can say that the choice of recipients is a crucial moment in preparation for christening. The choice of godparents for baptism was based on good relationships between godfathers and parents. They tried to choose people who were baptized, kind, quiet, with with a light hand, for whom everything is going well in life. To accept a child from the font with a light hand was considered to give him a long and happy life. An important point in choosing godparents is the absence of marriage between them, both during the christening and after them.

For baptism, it is enough to invite one of the godparents: for a boy - a godfather, for a girl - a godmother. Catholics do this, but in Orthodoxy, according to Russian tradition, both are invited for a child.

What do godparents give?

At christenings, the godfather gives a cross, and the godmother gives a baptismal shirt, scarf and kryzhma, to which she receives the child from the holy font.

According to the first ancient rituals, the godfather paid for the christening, presented the midwife with money (“ransomed” the baby) and gave the child’s mother a chintz scarf.

When making a choice - to be a godmother or not, do not be guided by signs and superstitions. Don't think about the question " Why can't the first girl be baptized? ?. Becoming a godmother is a sacred, honorable and responsible role. The Church does not recognize or confirm any existing superstition and stands firmly in their path. According to church canons, the godmother not only cannot lose anything, but on the contrary, she gains positive energy by participating in a good cause. The role of goddaughter is especially important for an unmarried woman. After all, only by becoming a godmother can you understand your responsibility for the purity of your goddaughter’s soul before God. A good godmother will take part in the upbringing of her godchildren and will become an adviser and support in life.

When deciding to become a girl’s godmother, remember that baptism is a good deed, and the role of godmother is honorable, and God's grace will descend on your life.

12.07.2016

The rite of baptism in Rus' has always been one of the most exciting and mysterious, so it is not surprising that our ancestors at one time associated this solemn event with various kinds of beliefs. One of these superstitions that has survived to this day is the assertion that the first girl cannot be baptized by an unmarried girl.

The first version of the appearance of this belief sounds quite realistic and reasonable. The fact is that the godmother is the spiritual mentor of the child, who must explain to the child a lot about the spiritual component of our life. It is believed that a very young unmarried person does not have enough life experience to provide the child with proper protection.

But we must also take into account the fact that in our time some young girls are already independent mature individuals capable of taking care of others and, especially, their godchildren. And some representatives of the fair sex, having a wealth of experience family life behind them, they are children even for their own households.

The conclusion is obvious: nowadays everything depends on the person. We must also take into account the fact that previously in Rus' girls did not have so many options for personal development outside of marriage, so it is likely that the role of godmother was suitable only for those who had already gotten married.

The second version of the appearance of this superstition is no longer so real and does not have any evidence. However, our ancestors were sure that if a young unmarried girl took on the role of godmother of a little girl, then in the future she would face misfortunes in her personal life, and she would never be able to give birth.

Many people are still confident in the validity of this statement, and, frankly, it is useless to argue with them. Among them are even those who are able to give examples from their own life experience. True, these “cases from life”, as a rule, turn out to be just an invention of the narrator.

Church workers, answering the question of whether it is possible for an unmarried girl to baptize a little girl, are of the opinion that such a decision should be made based on one’s own readiness to accept such responsibility.

The only condition that the church obliges to comply with is that the godfather and godmother must never tie their lives by marriage in the future. The fact is that after christening these people already become relatives. However, this rule concerns mainly the wedding ceremony and, to some extent, also relates to the area of ​​superstition.